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"I 've often wish'd that I had clear, For life, six hundred pounds a year; A handsome house to lodge a friend; A river at my garden's end; A terrace walk, and half a rood Of land set out to plant a wood." Jonathan Swift / Imitation of Horace, Book ii. Sat. 6.
Imitation of Horace, Book ii. Sat. 6.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"So geographers, in Afric maps, With savage pictures fill their gaps, And o'er unhabitable downs Place elephants for want of towns." Jonathan Swift / Poetry, a Rhapsody.
Poetry, a Rhapsody.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Where Young must torture his invention To flatter knaves, or lose his pension." Jonathan Swift / Poetry, a Rhapsody.
Poetry, a Rhapsody.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Hobbes clearly proves that every creature Lives in a state of war by nature." Jonathan Swift / Poetry, a Rhapsody.
Poetry, a Rhapsody.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"So, naturalists observe, a flea Has smaller fleas that on him prey; And these have smaller still to bite 'em; And so proceed ad infinitum." Jonathan Swift / Poetry, a Rhapsody.
Poetry, a Rhapsody.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Libertas et natale solum: Fine words! I wonder where you stole 'em." Jonathan Swift / Verses occasioned by Whitshed's Motto on his Coach.
Verses occasioned by Whitshed's Motto on his Coach.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"A college joke to cure the dumps." Jonathan Swift / Cassinus and Peter.
Cassinus and Peter.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"'T is an old maxim in the schools, That flattery 's the food of fools; Yet now and then your men of wit Will condescend to take a bit." Jonathan Swift / Cadenus and Vanessa.
Cadenus and Vanessa.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Hail fellow, well met." Jonathan Swift / My Lady's Lamentation.
My Lady's Lamentation.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Big-endians and small-endians." Jonathan Swift / Gulliver's Travels. Part i. Chap. iv. Voyage to Lilliput.
Gulliver's Travels. Part i. Chap. iv. Voyage to Lilliput.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"And he gave it for his opinion, that whoever could make two ears of corn, or two blades of grass, to grow upon a spot of ground where only one grew before, would deserve better of mankind, and do more essential service to his country, than the whole race of politicians put together." Jonathan Swift / Gulliver's Travels. Part ii. Chap. vii. Voyage to Brobdingnag.
Gulliver's Travels. Part ii. Chap. vii. Voyage to Brobdingnag.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"He had been eight years upon a project for extracting sunbeams out of cucumbers, which were to be put in phials hermetically sealed, and let out to warm the air in raw inclement summers." Jonathan Swift / Gulliver's Travels. Part iii. Chap. v. Voyage to Laputa.
Gulliver's Travels. Part iii. Chap. v. Voyage to Laputa.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"It is a maxim, that those to whom everybody allows the second place have an undoubted title to the first." Jonathan Swift / Tale of a Tub. Dedication.
Tale of a Tub. Dedication.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Seamen have a custom, when they meet a whale, to fling him out an empty tub by way of amusement, to divert him from laying violent hands upon the ship." Jonathan Swift / Tale of a Tub. Preface.
Tale of a Tub. Preface.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Bread is the staff of life." Jonathan Swift / Tale of a Tub. Preface.
Tale of a Tub. Preface.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Books, the children of the brain." Jonathan Swift / Tale of a Tub. Sect. i.
Tale of a Tub. Sect. i.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"As boys do sparrows, with flinging salt upon their tails." Jonathan Swift / Tale of a Tub. Sect. vii.
Tale of a Tub. Sect. vii.
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"He made it a part of his religion never to say grace to his meat." Jonathan Swift / Tale of a Tub. Sect. xi.
Tale of a Tub. Sect. xi.
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"How we apples swim!" Jonathan Swift / Brother Protestants.
Brother Protestants.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"The two noblest things, which are sweetness and light." Jonathan Swift / Battle of the Books.
Battle of the Books.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"The reason why so few marriages are happy is because young ladies spend their time in making nets, not in making cages." Jonathan Swift / Thoughts on Various Subjects.
Thoughts on Various Subjects.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Censure is the tax a man pays to the public for being eminent." Jonathan Swift / Thoughts on Various Subjects.
Thoughts on Various Subjects.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"A nice man is a man of nasty ideas." Jonathan Swift / Thoughts on Various Subjects.
Thoughts on Various Subjects.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"If Heaven had looked upon riches to be a valuable thing, it would not have given them to such a scoundrel." Jonathan Swift / Letter to Miss Vanbromrigh, Aug. 12, 1720.
Letter to Miss Vanbromrigh, Aug. 12, 1720.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Not die here in a rage, like a poisoned rat in a hole." Jonathan Swift / Letter to Bolingbroke, March 21, 1729.
Letter to Bolingbroke, March 21, 1729.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"A penny for your thoughts." Jonathan Swift / Introduction to Polite Conversation.
Introduction to Polite Conversation.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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"Do you think I was born in a wood to be afraid of an owl?" Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"The sight of you is good for sore eyes." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"'T is as cheap sitting as standing." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"I hate nobody: I am in charity with the world." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"I won't quarrel with my bread and butter." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"She 's no chicken; she 's on the wrong side of thirty, if she be a day." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"She looks as if butter wou'dn't melt in her mouth." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"If it had been a bear it would have bit you." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on with a pitchfork." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"I mean you lie--under a mistake." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"Lord Sp. Why, he is an Anythingarian." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue i.
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"He was a bold man that first eat an oyster." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"That is as well said as if I had said it myself." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"You must take the will for the deed." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"Fingers were made before forks, and hands before knives." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"She has more goodness in her little finger than he has in his whole body." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"Lord! I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"They say a carpenter 's known by his chips." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"I 'll give you leave to call me anything, if you don't call me "spade."" Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"May you live all the days of your life." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"I have fed like a farmer: I shall grow as fat as a porpoise." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"I always like to begin a journey on Sundays, because I shall have the prayers of the Church to preserve all that travel by land or by water." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
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"I know Sir John will go, though he was sure it would rain cats and dogs." Jonathan Swift / Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Polite Conversation. Dialogue ii.
Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, 9th ed. (Little, Brown, 1905), public domain
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